I've gone into Autumnal overdrive. Mere weeks have passed since I was sunning myself in Portugal and I am grasping the change of seasons with both hands; I love living in a temperate climate. A side effect of this is that I have shopped way too much (you saw the signs: recent musings on style and shoes). I am beyond guilt sweats as frankly everything is settled in my mind by the assertion that: I deserve it. Even if I don't. Hah!
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| via crush cul de sac |
The fields where I walk the pup have gone from sun-baked, cracked earth to the more familiar sodden territory that I now trudge a round, in my wellies. Usually cursing the fact that I have a (sometimes) long-haired dog whose paws are clogged with mud.
Sometimes here I write about the fact that I have pain in my teeth and jaw - it's been a long running saga, entering its fourth year soon - but a lot of the time, I don't want to mention it. This is because it smacks to me of the kind of blogging self-regard that I struggle with. People visit a blog to see lovely images and to read sparkling prose; I am dubious about their interest in the real, grainy, non-sepia-tinted life of me. The pain went undiagnosed for a long time and is now subject to the kind of modern google-inspired self-diagnosis that is just so tricky. It feels like tooth ache but is actually a muscular/trigger point issue - I am loosing you now aren't I?! It's a multi-faceted thing, as complicated as can be with no clear rhyme or reason. I have learnt to live with it, as people live with back pain and such like. A lot of the impetus for me to make recent life changes has come from devising a way to manage this pain. I subscribe to the view that if you want a different outcome, you need to do stuff differently. It's not sophisticated but it's where I am at right now.
So the pain goes on; there are good days and bad days. There is no quick fix. But occasionally I have to write about it, as I feel to leave it out would be dishonest. This is me.
Meanwhile I am, day by day, still revelling in my freedom. This week alone:
Books read: 2
Beds made: not many
Morning runs, dew on the grass: 2
Massages: 1
Yoga classes: 1
Alexander Technique lessons: 1
Glasses of wine consumed: 5 (maybe 6?!)
Blogs read: many...
Dog walks: 9
Swear words: 7
You tube clips watched: 3
Hours 'wasted' on Pinterest: countless ;-)
Minutes spent considering how the word 'bitch' has entered the vernacular: 2
Regrets: none
Have a happy weekend :-)
